Tamra Judge attended therapy with her 33-year-old son Ryan Vieth in the Nov. 12 episode of ‘The Real Housewives of Orange County’ and they both emotionally opened up about their rough past as mother and son.
It was an intense episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County on Nov. 12 and it all had to do with Tamra Judge, 52, and her son Ryan Vieth, 33. The concerned mother joined Ryan for a therapy session with Dr. Mcayla Sarno in a powerful scene and admitted she feels like she let him down when he was growing up and has fears about his unhappiness now. The reality star encouraged Ryan to go to therapy earlier in the season of the show after he admitted to feeling stuck and she was invited to attend one of his sessions to discuss their relationship.
“He’s not in a good headspace and I hate to see him struggle,” Tamra said in the episode. “I feel like he’s at a point in his life when he’s just numb to life. When Ryan gets overloaded with things, he just kind of shuts down. He’s at that point in his life right now where he’s not happy, and I want to see him happy.”
She became emotional when Dr. Sarno asked her to describe what it was like for Ryan growing up, which led to her admitting her guilt. “I was 17 when I got pregnant with Ryan,” she explained in a shaky, tearful voice. “I was still in high school.” She went on to talk about getting married to Ryan’s father and it lasting “probably a year”.
“Ryan and I were alone, the two of us, for 13 years” she continued. “I carry guilt ’cause I feel like I let him down. I look at my kids now and the opportunities that they have. I got two kids in college now. Ryan never… He ran out of the house at 18 ’cause he couldn’t stand his stepdad. He doesn’t want to be controlled, he doesn’t want to be told what to do, so he fights life.”
In an on-camera interview, Ryan also admitted to feeling resentment toward his other siblings because although he didn’t have the worst life, he feels they received more opportunities than he did. After raising Ryan alone, Tamra married her second husband, Simon Barney in 1998 and had three children with him, including Sidney Barney, 20, Spencer Barney, 18, and Sophia Barney, 13, before they divorced in 2011.
Ryan became a father four years ago when his daughter, Ava, was born from a previous relationship and Tamra also touched upon how seeing him with his own child affects her. “You are a good dad,” she said to him as they both cried in the session. “But I see that he’s putting all of his energy — all of it — into her. He is so troubled by his past that he doesn’t want her to have that life.
“I can look at my son’s eyes and see he’s just not himself,” she later said in a confessional. “He just wants to protect this little girl so much, like just smother her, and he doesn’t let other people in. He isolates himself with Ava, and it’s starting to concern me.”
Perhaps the most emotional part of the session was when Dr. Sarno read Ryan’s written down beliefs to Tamra. “I’m a bad person, worthless. I’m a failure. Can’t succeed. Powerless. I don’t belong. I don’t matter,” the list read.
“It just makes me wanna die,” Tamra responded in her confessional. “I worry that one day Ryan might commit suicide. That’s my biggest, biggest fear.”
Tamra later told her husband Eddie Judge, 46, about the session and praised his wife even though she was clearly upset about the difficult situation. “Tamra’s a great mom with all her children. Every kid is different,” he said on camera. “Some need to be coddled, some need to be motivated, some need a kick in the ass. When you’re struggling with your childhood issues as a man, I don’t think you’re a man, k? So just get over it, move on, grow up, take care of your responsibilities. That’s life.”