So much of 90 Day Fiance legend Larissa Lima’s life has been making the best of a bad situation.
Whether it’s putting a positive spin on her ICE arrest or launching a brand after her failed marriage, she’s done well.
But sometimes, even the strongest self-styled queens can’t take anymore.
Larissa shared with fans that she is in a state of despair and misery and doesn’t see a way out.
On Thursday, April 22, Larissa Lima took to her Instagram Stories to share her despair.
“How much can someone take?” she asked.
“Got fired,” Larissa’s list began. “Got arrested by ICE.”
“ICE took my passport,” Larissa lamented.
“Moved to a state (because I believed in promises) that is cold, farm style,” she wrote.
According to Larissa, Colorado has “no real warm beautiful sun, just cold sun.”
“Bones been hurting because it’s too cold,” Larissa lamented.
“Can’t move, go to gym because it’s too cold,” she explained.
Larissa then wrote that her “emotional stress” is at a “high level.”
“My whole body is sore,” Larissa noted. “Hurting.”
She added that even her nerves are hurting.
And that was not all that is keeping Larissa down.
“You guys are wishing my death constantly in my DMs,” Larissa wrote.
“Just remember,” she told them, “if that happens, you can’t talk s–t all day about a deceased person.”
“So chill,” Larissa suggested.
Larissa is making clear references to both a desire for a warmer climate and, frankly, to what may be seasonal depression.
She has been very open about her mental health struggles in the past.
Some of us might find her description of Colorado inviting, but to someone who likes warmth and needs sunlight … it is less so.
She also makes clear reference there to the constant barrage of hatred and malice.
Though those of us who followed Larissa’s actual story find her sympathetic, 90 Day Fiance viewers did not get the whole story.
And some of those who decided that she’s awful have no filter and no sense of right and wrong. It’s tragic.
That was not all that Larissa had to say.
In another Instagram Story, she delved further into her current reality and her state of despair.
She feels trapped and she doesn’t see an immediate way out of that.
“When I was arrested by ICE, I didn’t expect it (obviously),” Larissa’s other Story began.
“But now,” she described, “I’m dying every day because I don’t have my passport.”
“I can’t fly,” Larissa lamented.
“I’m stuck in Colorado Springs,” Larissa wrote.
She referred to the city’s “cold, gray sky.”
Again, just because that sounds like paradise to some of us doesn’t mean that it’s good for Larissa.
“I don’t step out of bed or outside,” Larissa shared, referring to classic depression symptoms.
“I can’t even say goodbye to my family,” she wrote with alarming phrasing.
Larissa explained: “Because I can’t leave the USA.”
“I didn’t move to Colorado Springs because I wanted [to],” Larissa expressed.
“I was filming and I got fired,” she recalled.
“At that point, I didn’t have a choice,” Larissa noted.
She explained that she had no choice “because the house was already sold and everything packed.”
“I got fired one day before I moved,” Larissa noted.
“It was too late to turn back,” she grimly acknowledged.
“I don’t know how much someone can take,” Larissa expressed.
She then referred to the “avalanche” of stressful events in her life.
This meant her ICE arrest, her current inability to travel, and her depression living in a cold, rural area.
Larissa made some offhand comments about not enjoying hiking (relatable).
She has actually spoken about that in the past.
But Larissa also made alarming comments that sounded like, well, red flags for suicide.
“I’m never going to wake up and see the sun again,” Larissa despaired.
“Utterly disappointed,” she expressed. “Utterly regret.”
If you find that scary and find yourself worrying for Larissa, you are not alone.
Larissa received a flurry of messages, including from unexpected people.
Vanessa Guerra and Debbie Johnson are not exactly Larissa’s best friends, but they reached out to her.
Larissa also had a lengthy conversation over the phone with beloved 90 Day Fiance blogger John Yates.
We here at THG wish Larissa the very best. Our hearts go out to her.
Some 90 Day Fiance fans were so distracted by the show that they forgot that she is a real person with real feelings.
Larissa is in a well of despair and doesn’t see a way out. We hope that she knows that she is loved and valued.