For most of 90 Day Fiance Season 8, viewers were comfortable labeling Natalie Mordovtseva as a “villain.”
But when Episode 9 rolled around, millions of fans were suddenly rethinking things.
Natalie practically begged Mike to help her make concrete plans for their future … and Mike rudely ignored her.
As you can see in this clip, Natalie was in a lot of pain and uncertainty.
Before we get to why fans are suddenly feeling sympathy for someone they once viewed as a she-devil, let’s track Natalie’s progress this season.
At first, some of us were sympathetic for her as she realized just how remote and in-the-middle-of-nowhere Mike lived.
When he “offered” (threatened) to take her fishing, many of us felt kinship with Natalie’s less than enthusiastic response.
Watching Natalie adjust to her new life in extremely rural Washington was just fine.
She slowly made friends with the cat, she refused to unpack her luggage, and she slowly developed a routine.
But there was a shift this season when Natalie began to try to control Mike’s food … and berate him with insults.
Somehow, a simple conversation about making dinner turned into a vicious attack on Mike.
Natalie insisted upon shrimp and rice for the meal, which Mike grudgingly accepted.
When he suggested that they stir-fry it (to give it, you know, a flavor other than despair), Natalie’s response was cruel.
Somehow, insulting Mike’s weight and insisting that he needed to lose some (who decided this other than Natalie?) was just the beginning.
Natalie asked his IQ, suggested that he was uncultured, and called him “low class.”
Finally, she declared that he was “drunk” and didn’t want him to touch her — all because he tried to let her know that food was ready.
To her credit, Natalie did apologize for her awful behavior.
She had clearly been lashing out over not having the engagement ring back yet.
But she had said insults that, frankly, should have ended the relationship right there.
Mike cut her some slack — and some fans noted that Natalie clearly has some form of disordered eating (likely orthorexia).
There is a difference between eating healthy food and obsessing over it, and Natalie does the latter.
Her bad habit even flared up when she and Mike went out to dinner with his mother, as she tried to control his eating in front of her.
Shaming someone for their eating habits, trying to pressure them to try to change their bodies … that’s toxic behavior.
You should marry the person you love, not someone whom you hope to mold and shape into your “perfect” partner.
But on Episode 9, we saw Natalie’s frustrations mount as her efforts to discuss wedding planning with Mike were heartlessly rebuffed.
While shopping, Natalie brought up the things that they needed to figure out — drinks, place settings, and more for the wedding.
Mike mostly just muttered noncommittal things while Natalie spoke, trying to prompt him to talk to her, to engage with her.
Natalie’s not stupid — she’ll tell you herself that she has a 110 IQ (which is at the higher end of average, though please remember that IQ tests are bogus). She picked up on Mike’s vibe.
Even though she worried that Mike’s silent treatment meant that he didn’t want to marry her, she pressed on.
Why? Because he needed to either tell her that he doesn’t want to marry her, or help her plan the wedding.
There is no third option — but Mike, indecisive and not expressive, refused to do either.
Mike remained silent for the most part before declaring that it was time for them to leave the store.
He explained to the camera that he wasn’t trying to be mean, but that when he tried to explain his hesitation, Natalie took it personally and felt insulted.
Well … there’s no non-insulting way to say “I spent thousands of my dollars and months of your time but I’m having second thoughts, so be patient with me.” He needed to say it anyway.
Mike and Natalie could potentially overcome this massive communication gap — and maybe they will on Episode 10, if previews are any indication.
But fans are not convinced — despite spoilers saying that they’re very much married — that Mike and Natalie are right for each other.
Perhaps the rest of this season will show us what’s between them that we’re just not seeing right now.